First Things First: Why Review the Original We-Vibe Tango when the We-Vibe Tango X is Out Now?
You guys know it, I know it, we all know it—I’m a really new blogger. Because of that, I’m inevitably behind the curve on a lot of things. While the We-Vibe Tango has been a top pick by numerous sex toy reviewers who have come before me, I didn’t get my hands on one until early 2020. By the time I got my website set up and made the leap to become a sex toy reviewer myself, We-Vibe had already announced a new, upgraded version of the Tango.
The Tango is inevitably going to get phased out in favor of the new model, the We-Vibe Tango X. The original Tango is already being listed as a clearance item on most websites, and soon you won’t be able to find one at all. So, why bother writing a review for a sex toy that’s become obsolete?
Well, I’ll be honest—I only have so many sex toys. At the time of writing this review (January 2021), I didn’t have any working relationships with any sex toy retailers, so I didn’t have a reliable influx of new sex toys to review. I started planning this blog way in advance, and I structured my content based on reviewing the sex toys I already have. Plus, I figured that if I published this quickly enough, maybe my review would help influence someone who’s wondering if it’s worth it to pick up a Tango on clearance.
I also really, really love the Tango. I’m clutching my chest in longing, waiting for the day I can get my hands on the Tango X, because looking at the upgraded model, it appears to have fixed ALL of the complaints I have about the original Tango. Which, I will of course write in this review.
Bear with me for this one—take a step back in time with me. Let’s go to a year before the Tango X was announced, before the COVID-19 pandemic, before the Wendy’s Breakfast Menu was a thing. Pretend this review is still hot new relevant content.
And who knows? Perhaps this review can serve as the final leaflet of praise placed in the time capsule of the original We-Vibe Tango . Anyway, read on!
A Quick Recap:
In my previous post, I gave a run down of my history with bullet vibrators. In short: I hadn’t had many good experiences. All the bullet vibrators I had encountered up to that point had been weak, cheap, buzzy, irritating, and tragically short-lived. For a while, I was convinced bullet vibrators weren’t for me at all.
My partner and I became interested in bullet vibrators, specifically the We-Vibe Tango, after doing research for our first joint sex toy purchase. It wasn’t part of our very first purchase, but it was the second big-ticket vibrator we purchased. For $75 at the time, we were worried, but it turned out to be more than worth the money.
Since the original model of the We-Vibe Tango is being phased out, though, they’re now starting to be discounted and retail for a lot less. If you’re on a budget and can’t justify purchasing the Tango X, this is a great chance to snap up the original Tango while it’s marked down.
While I had to pay $75 for this bullet vibrator, it was worth every fucking penny. I’ll argue that the Tango has probably been my most-used sex toy in the past year, both in the context of partnered sex as well as solo masturbation. It’s powerful, it’s easy to clean, and it’s a simple way to get the job done. Like, I fucking love this bad boy. I wish so badly that I had gotten it earlier.
Why I Wish The Tango Had Been One of my First Sex Toys:
The Tango is pricey. When I was in college, the thought of paying $75 for a vibrator would’ve been preposterous to me. But despite the price, the Tango would’ve been so well suited to the situation I was in at the time, and so worth it in the long run.
I was living with my parents my senior year of college, with the exception of one semester, and I lived with them for the year after I graduated, too. My parents are very uptight around sex stuff, particularly my mom. My mom also liked to go through my things and then yell at me about what she found. I’m very, very glad I moved out.
The Tango would’ve been an excellent first vibrator not only because of its power, but because it’s so easily hidden.
Because it’s so small, it would’ve been way easier for me to hide from my nosy mom. It can fit in a tiny internal pocket of a backpack, a makeup bag, a pencil case, you name it. It’s unsuspecting enough that it doesn’t catch the eye or draw the attention of a snoop in the way that a larger vibrator would.
The Tango is Super Practical:
Most people probably don’t have to worry about the best vibrator to hide from snooping parents. But these traits also make the Tango a great vibrator for people who have limited space, who like to travel, or people who want a vibrator that’s easy to bring with them in case of unexpected hookups.
Think about all these situations. Maybe you live in a cramped dorm room or a big city “apartment” that’s closer to the square footage of a closet. The pinkie-finger-sized Tango won’t impose on your limited living space. The same goes for someone packing a bag for a vacation. You wanna get off on vacation without going over your luggage weight limit? Check it out—it’s the We-Vibe Tango. If you’re going to a sex friend’s house for a fuck appointment, or if you’re anticipating hooking up with someone at the club or at another event, the Tango is easy to slip into a purse or pocket.
Of course, we’re living in the COVID-19 hell world, so it’s actually more likely that you ARE living with your parents versus going to a club or on a plane. But that just makes the Tango even more appealing! It can be hidden in so many places. A wallet, a Nintendo Switch case, an empty bottle of ibuprofen…the possibilities are limitless!
In addition to being small, the Tango is also super quiet considering how intensely powerful it is. Which, if you’re aiming for subtlety or simply seeking not to be annoyed during your sex/masturbation session, is always a blessing.
Solo Performance of the We-Vibe Tango:
Okay, enough about the magical ways you can ferret away this vibrator like a mischievous little raccoon. Like I said before, this vibrator is powerful as fuck. It has four standard vibration settings and four pattern options, although I admittedly don’t ever use the pattern options. It’s powerful enough even on the weakest standard vibration setting, I can regularly orgasm without ever needing to increase the power. Of course, when I do increase the power, it’s even better.
Cheap, buzzy vibrators often make your genitals feel irritated or get numbed out. The Tango doesn’t suffer from this problem. It has deep, rumbly vibrations that go past the surface and provide high-quality, rich orgasms. With me, a beclitorised person, it delves past my external little niblet and vibrates all the internal clitoral structures, too. The result is super satisfying orgasms that never leave me feeling cheated or like I had a half-assed masturbation session.
Usually, the Tango can reliably make me orgasm in five to ten minutes. While your mileage will of course vary, I am personally often a very impatient person, so the Tango’s ability to quickly dish out orgasms is a big plus for me.
A few other quick notes: the Tango is constructed of body-safe ABS thermoplastic, it’s waterproof, and it’s fast and easy to clean.
The Tango as an Accessory:
The Tango isn’t popular simply for its ability to deliver excellent orgasms. There’s a lot of vibrators that can do that. What makes the Tango unique is that not only does it have exceptional vibrations, but it also has a shape that allows it to easily fit IN other sex toys and sex accessories.
When the Tango is placed into a dildo, it transforms the dildo into a source of powerful rumbly internal vibrations. The Tango’s plastic construction excels at transmitting vibration, and isn’t stifled by silicone dildos or other materials in which it is placed.
The Tango is also very popular for placement within strap-on harnesses. As you can see in the photo below, the Tango fits perfectly into either of the two bullet vibrator pouches of the SpareParts Joque harness. This takes strap-on sex to another level, and allows both the person wearing the harness as well as the person being penetrated to enjoy the Tango’s powerful vibrations.
Controls and Charging:
The Tango is controlled via a single button on the base of the vibrator. To turn the vibrator on or off, simply press and hold. To cycle through the Tango’s eight settings, just tap the button. The vibrator turns off once you come to the end of the settings options.
The Tango charges using a magnetic USB charger, which admittedly is kind of finicky. It easily detaches if it’s bumped or jostled, but this has never been a real problem for me. I set it on top of my nightstand and it’s usually good to go.
Complaints About the We-Vibe Tango:
The battery life of the Tango is tragically short, and usually only lasts for an hour or so. But, since it can make me orgasm in less than ten minutes of masturbation, this tends to only be a problem during longer partnered sex sessions. When my partner and I incorporate the Tango during sex, I’m always quick to put it back on the charger during any moments of downtime.
My other main complaints about the original Tango appear to have all been resolved with the upgraded Tango X, which I’m super happy about.
With the original Tango, I hated the color options. I have it in blue, but it sucked that the only two color options were bright pink and a blue that still looks very feminine to me. The color options combined with the distinct lipstick shape make the original Tango feel very feminine, and it kind of grated on my gender dysphoria issues at times. With the Tango X, one of the new color options is a “midnight blue,” a super sleek navy that looks way less feminine and is way more in line with how I prefer my sex toys to look.
My other complaint with the original Tango are its controls. The single button design doesn’t allow you to go forward or backwards in vibration/pattern selections—instead you have to cycle through all of the options before returning to your selection of choice. The Tango X has two buttons that allow you to go forward or backwards, it has a silicone grip for easier grasping, and it also has a travel lock.
Since my two biggest complaints about the original Tango have been corrected in the Tango X, it just makes me want the new version even more.
Final Thoughts on the We-Vibe Tango:
I love the We-Vibe Tango. It’s my most used vibrator because it’s powerful, it’s convenient, and it can be used in multiple different ways. The only thing I regret about purchasing this tiny, powerful bullet vibrator is that I didn’t buy it sooner. I highly recommend snagging the original Tango while it’s still available as a clearance item.
I’m frothing at the mouth with my desire to get the We-Vibe Tango X, and you can bet that as soon as I manage to get my hands on it I’ll be posting a review to this blog. Until then, though, I’ll be continuing to enjoy the killer orgasms that the original Tango provides me with.
DISCLAIMER: I purchased the We-Vibe Tango with my own money. Affiliate links have been used in this post.